I’m happy to own a pair of rubber boots. That’s not a sentence I ever imagined writing. But today, was a day that without them I’m not sure I would have been able to leave home to go to my Pain Management Program. In fact, even with them it was still a near miss.
My feet and legs swell – often. It started as a side effect from one of my pain medications. However, I’ve come to believe that it’s more likely an uncommon symptom of my illness because it wasn’t an issue before; and because I stopped taking that medication over a year ago and the frequency with which the swelling still occurs hasn’t changed much since then.
When I woke up this morning, the pain in my legs was intense and I could feel the tingling sensation that usually accompanies a pain flare going up and down my legs all the way to my toes. Getting out of bed revealed that my feet and ankles were swollen – yet again – and the swelling would continue. It’s an odd thing to watch a body part swell to twice its normal size. It’s even stranger feeling it happen.
I hoped lying in bed again and putting my legs up on a stack of pillows for a while might help to reduce the swelling, as it has done in the past, but that didn’t happen today. By the time I showered and dressed, it was obvious that I wouldn’t be able to wear any of my usual boots or shoes. I had to choose between a pair of sneakers I don’t often wear and my rubber boots. Because it was cold and raining today, I decided to go with my rubber boots.
I didn’t expect it to be, but it was actually a struggle to get my feet into them. When deciding what to wear I had chosen cuffed cotton pants that look like sweatpants and thin cotton socks to avoid any extra bulk. Neither of those clothing choices made any difference. Pulling my rubber boots on was still a struggle, although they were quite roomy and comfortable once I got my feet into them.
It was an even bigger struggle trying to take them off my feet when I got back home. This particular pair of rubber boots has a zipper along the back of the calf, which usually makes slipping them on and off easy. After undoing the zipper, I wasn’t able to pull them off. I had to engage in a real tug of war to get them off my feet. Unbelievably, my feet and ankles had swollen more since putting the boots on a few hours earlier.
When I started it, it seemed silly to write a post about my fashion choices, but this is and may continue to be a real problem. What would I have done today if I didn’t own a pair a rubber boots? What would I have done if I couldn’t manipulate them enough to push my feet into them? It’s not exactly flip-flop weather outside and wearing an ordinary pair of shoes or boots might have proven to be extremely painful.
As I started out saying at the beginning of this post: I’m happy to own a pair of rubber boots. Because had I not, I might not have been able to leave home today…
My Small Surrenders 