Sometimes I’m lucky enough to spend time in the middle of nature doing one of my favourite things.
I love drawing lines. I’ve shared many posts where I talk about the meditative quality of opening a clean page in my sketchbook and simply drawing lines. I can get lost for hours as I fill a page with line drawings and doodles.
I’m home after a long absence.
I left for my trip a few weeks before Christmas. During the days leading up to my departure, I felt conflicted for so many reasons about whether I should go or not. Even, when the plane landed the knot of doubt in my stomach still hadn’t begun to unwind. Now that I’ve returned home and I feel somewhat settled, I’m happy and grateful that I went.
My trip was a mix of adventurous ups and downs. I did so much more than I planned or expected. During my travels, I spent time with family, I met up with old friends and I made some new friends; but, unfortunately, I also had to face losing and removing relationships with some overseas connections from my life.
I walked a lot too; mainly because I had little choice but also because it’s the best way to see new places; and I traveled, more than I cared to, by train, which proved uncomfortable for my legs and back. I even took a trip within my trip; that required more travel by airplane. I re-familiarized myself with an old city I love and I fell in love with a new to me city I’d long dreamed about visiting.
I’ve been home for more than a week. Although I’m resting, as much as humanly possible, since I crossed the threshold into my home, the jet lag and pain from an 8-hour flight and crossing five time zones aren’t being kind to me. I knew I’d have to take it easy for a few days, just as I did when I landed on the other side of the pond, but I’m feeling as if coming home might have been the hardest leg of my travels. The pain in my legs and my overall fatigue may actually be ganging up on me…
Thankfully, I always have something to distract me – even if just slightly – from the pain coursing through my legs, which is now preventing me from sleeping peacefully to get the rest that I need. Instead of sleeping – most nights, and long stretches of each day – I’ve been drawing and I finished a page in my art journal/sketchbook that I started while I was away. The intention behind this page was to help me choose patterns for the wings of a butterfly that one of my young cousins asked me to draw for her. I chose the patterns a few weeks ago but I also wanted to add colour to the page.
My inability to sleep and the need for distraction from my pain, proved the perfect combination to keep me focused on finishing the page. As has happened at similar times before, the creative practice I’ve developed in recent years got me through more tough nights; and it will probably help get me to the other side of countless more.
It’s not a heart, but in the spirit of the day it is red. ❤️
If you’re feeling lonely today or healing a broken heart, maybe tracing the lines in this line drawing can distract you from that heaviness for a moment.
Wait. Before you, literally, give me the finger and move on to another site: I’m not being glib. These lines do have a deeper meaning and I hope they will help others as they have helped me.
Drawing like this, without thinking or planning, is part of the creative practice I’ve been developing for myself since shortly after becoming ill. I use it to move my focus away from my chronic pain when it becomes too intense or it prevents me from sleeping. It doesn’t stop the pain. However, similar to meditation where focussing on the breath can ease anxiety, reduce stress, or help to relax our bodies so sleep comes more easily, meditative line drawing can help loosen the tension felt in the body – even for a short while.
Meditative line drawing (and doodling) shift my energy, so not every thought and emotion I have is directed toward my pain. This aspect of my creative practice has become one of the more frequently used methods for me to mentally cope with this illness; especially because I don’t always feel well enough to do significant amounts of creative activity like detailed drawing, painting or even writing, which all require a larger investment of time and energy.
Drawing lines is an activity that uses very little energy and causes even less stress or anxiety because it doesn’t have to be planned and it can be done anywhere at any time. All that’s needed is a pen or pencil and paper. Although, truth be told, I now own enough art supplies to open a store. Still, the simplicity of this practice when weighed against the benefits makes me grateful I discovered meditative drawing and doodling, within the larger concept of keeping an art journal when I did. Being creative gives me something other than pain to think about and manage.
Try drawing lines of your own, without thinking about where your pen or pencil will go for a few minutes. You might be surprised that doing this unclutters your mind – even if it’s just a bit to begin with – and it could be the start of your own creative practice too.
My Small Surrenders 