Zentangle: My Way

I’ve been tangling. I like saying that. Although, it sounds a bit grandiose because I’ve only learned about two dozen official tangle patterns, and completed six regular-sized tiles and one 5”x7” page filled with the two dozen patterns I’ve learned.

I worked my way through the ‘Zentangle Basics 1’ instruction book over the past few weeks. I did it with a few small hacks. First, I didn’t buy the official square white Zentangle tiles because I was uncertain about committing to Zentangle by buying the official kit. I decided instead to use a 5”x7” art sketchbook – the same as my art/gratitude journal – mainly so I can draw the individual steps as I learn each tangle pattern, which I do by tracing the lid of a small loose-leaf tea tin as a frame for drawing each of the steps in a tangle. It has been a good exercise for me to learn the tangle patterns using this method of repetition: not simply because I’m learning to draw them but also because it increases my patience and helps me to focus my attention.

After learning four patterns, I was then going to mark off a 3.5”x3.5” square on a page of the sketchbook with a ruler to use as a Zentangle tile, but I found I didn’t have to measure anything because as I looked around my small space I noticed that my drink coasters measure exactly 3.5”x3.5”. I traced the decorated piece of square glass then I followed the steps outlined in the Zentangle instruction book and I drew a string to form sections within the 3.5”x3.5” space to fill with the tangle patterns. I repeated these steps with new tangle patterns six times and I now have six completed ‘tiles’, and one large 5”x7” mess of 25 tangle patterns. I call it a mess in jest because I’m proud of what I’ve learned, but my eye for perfection can see the few tangle patterns with which I’ve struggled peeking out at me and I have the urge to try to fix them, which goes against the Zentangle method.

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I should add that until about a week ago I didn’t have the recommended Sakura Pigma Micron pens. I started out with an ultra-fine black Sharpie pen. This was partly because it seemed impossible to get a hold of the Micron pens anywhere, and I’m limited in my ability to venture out to do things, so I ordered the Sharpies online. I finally located Sakura Microns online, in abundance, at Cult Pens – Pinterest is a great resource when you’re trying to find something you really want. I have to admit that I find tangling patterns with the Micron pens a lot easier. The ink flows more smoothly, the different nib sizes make it easier to fill in the larger areas in some tangles, and the black ink is richer.

The last hack is one I read about on a blog somewhere – I wish I could remember which one so I could give it credit. Shading is used in Zentangle to add dimension to tangles. You can add shading to the tangle patterns in your tile with a pencil then using a blending stump or Tortillion blend and create a softer effect. The hack I learned is to use a cotton swab/Q-tip instead of a blending stump to smudge and blend the pencil to add dimension to the tangle patterns. This is working really well to add shading to the tiles I’m creating in my sketchbook. It’s interesting to see how I can transform the lines from flat marks on a page to images with depth.

I think I’ll continue to use my hacks for a while longer until I feel more confident, especially because my medications sometimes make my hands unsteady and I fear ruining many real Zentangle squares. However, I will definitely continue to use the method I’ve developed with the lid of my loose-leaf tea tin to learn new tangle patterns when I graduate to using official Zentangle squares. It’s nice to flip through the pages of my sketchbook as a reference for what tangle patterns I can use and to see what I’ve learned.

I had difficulty finding a song to add to this post to reflect the sentiment I had about choosing not to adhere to the precision of the Zentangle method (i.e. improvising with materials), but as I searched for a song about options/choice I came across this song by Yusuf Islam (formerly Cat Stevens) that felt right: In the End. The blurb on the page where I found the song says, “According to Yusuf Islam, in the song he is asking people to look at themselves and check that they’re making the right choices because they’ll be judged – in the end.”

 

Yusuf Islam – In The End

Gratitude and Creativity: Storms Don’t Last Forever

I have a legal battle with my employer in progress. Late last year – a few weeks before Christmas to be exact – I found out my horrible boss had wielded her powers to terminate my employment, which left me without extended health benefits or a job to return to when I regain my health. It was a shock to my system. It increased my pain, my blood pressure, my anxiety and made it impossible for me to sleep; or turn off my brain so I could get any kind of rest at all. I had to figure out what to do to fight back, while making sure I take care of my health. Those two things are hard to do when you’re in constant debilitating pain. Things I know my horrible boss has not lost an ounce of sleep or felt a pang of guilt about as she metes out this punishment to me because I refused to share the details of my health condition with her.

I hired a lawyer to deal directly with my horrible boss and the company’s horrible lawyer who has demonstrated that she must not have taken an ethics course in law school. Every minute that I have to contribute to dealing with this issue is time that I am not afforded to take care of my health. This lawsuit is causing me to have greater physical pain, emotional and psychological pain. I’m trying to give the information my lawyer needs from me to in small segments, so I don’t become overwhelmed again to the point where my pain is unbearable and I have to go to the emergency room to seek help to manage it. That happened on a few occasions before – and once since – I hired my lawyer and handed everything over to him.

It pains me to know that people I worked with on a daily basis now treat me this way without compassion for my suffering. We shared ideas and laughed together, and provided support to each other to do work that was never easy. I was part of a team until the moment I chose to guard the facts of my health from a woman who understands nothing about boundaries, confidentiality, or privacy. I chose to listen to my intuition and protect myself, which as it turns out, was the right thing to do.

Storms Don't Last Forever

Storms Don’t Last Forever

A couple of nights ago, we had a terrible thunderstorm. There were deafening claps of thunder followed by lengthy flashes of lightning. I’ve always been afraid of thunderstorms. Each flash of lightning made me shudder. I turned to my art/gratitude journal to preoccupy me from what was happening outside my windows. Thankfully, after a few hours, the storm ended and peace was restored to the night. I have to believe that just as that storm and many others I’ve witnessed in my life end, so will what I am enduring with my horrible boss. I have to believe that her mission to inflict harm will be thwarted and I will finally have peace restored to my life.

 

The Doors – Riders On the Storm

Discovering James Radcliffe Through Love

Yesterday I wrote about growing in my understanding of love. As I was uploading my post, I was on a video call with a cousin that lives overseas. He was miffed that I hadn’t shared my blog with him. I had to tell him that this blog is “a space to empty my thoughts and feelings where I don’t have to explain myself to anyone”, worry about judgement, and I receive support in a way that’s different from the people who know me personally who try to tailor things based on what they think I need. I also had to ensure him that not sharing my blog with him doesn’t mean I love him any less – he is after all at the top of my list of favourite British cousins.

Today as I looked through the feedback I received from readers, one piqued my curiosity and I’m glad I clicked through to his site. That reader is James Radcliffe. The first thing I read when I reached his site is this, “I write for all kinds of reasons. One of the big ones is: Writing about something lets me know how I feel about it; and why.” That statement captures the exact reason I write, but have never been able to articulate so precisely. It’s the reason I started this blog when the frustration of living under the cloud of pain medications and not being able to write poetry became unbearable. I’ve written poetry for so long that when I look through my writing I can tell you exactly where I was (figuratively and literally), what I was living through, and what I was feeling. My poetry is a chronology of my life and this blog has restarted its flow.

In addition to his words, James’ site also gave me another lovely surprise: his music. A few months ago when I started looking for ways to cope better with my illness and chronic pain I kept bumping into ‘Tibetan Healing Sounds’ and ‘Tibetan Singing Bowl Meditation Chakra Healing’ videos. I find the sounds and tones in the recordings very calming. Those sounds and tones are present in James Radcliffe’s music. I wrote this while listening to his latest album and the calm I feel is wonderful.

I have to believe that it’s no coincidence that writing about love and opening myself led me to discover James Radcliffe and I am happy to have found him. Take a listen and if you enjoy it support his work.

 

James Radcliffe – Present : Reflections [Deluxe]