Tag Archives for creative practice

Love Affair With Lines

I’ve grown to love drawing lines.

I’ve written many times about how relaxing it is and how it can take on a meditative quality because it requires very little thought; but also one’s focus is completely drawn to drawing lines.

When I’m feeling stressed or overwhelmed by pain, grabbing a pen and my art journal/sketchbook and just drawing lines is one of the things I do to calm my thoughts.

If you’re looking for something simple to help you cope with stress, go grab a pen (or pencil) and a piece of paper and focus on nothing but drawing lines for a few minutes. You might even surprise yourself and create some interesting patterns.

I hope this is helpful for even one person.

 

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Gratitude and Creativity: Jet Lagged Pain Doodles

I’m home after a long absence.

I left for my trip a few weeks before Christmas. During the days leading up to my departure, I felt conflicted for so many reasons about whether I should go or not. Even, when the plane landed the knot of doubt in my stomach still hadn’t begun to unwind. Now that I’ve returned home and I feel somewhat settled, I’m happy and grateful that I went.

My trip was a mix of adventurous ups and downs. I did so much more than I planned or expected. During my travels, I spent time with family, I met up with old friends and I made some new friends; but, unfortunately, I also had to face losing and removing relationships with some overseas connections from my life.

I walked a lot too; mainly because I had little choice but also because it’s the best way to see new places; and I traveled, more than I cared to, by train, which proved uncomfortable for my legs and back. I even took a trip within my trip; that required more travel by airplane. I re-familiarized myself with an old city I love and I fell in love with a new to me city I’d long dreamed about visiting.

I’ve been home for more than a week. Although I’m resting, as much as humanly possible, since I crossed the threshold into my home, the jet lag and pain from an 8-hour flight and crossing five time zones aren’t being kind to me. I knew I’d have to take it easy for a few days, just as I did when I landed on the other side of the pond, but I’m feeling as if coming home might have been the hardest leg of my travels. The pain in my legs and my overall fatigue may actually be ganging up on me…

Thankfully, I always have something to distract me – even if just slightly – from the pain coursing through my legs, which is now preventing me from sleeping peacefully to get the rest that I need. Instead of sleeping – most nights, and long stretches of each day – I’ve been drawing and I finished a page in my art journal/sketchbook that I started while I was away. The intention behind this page was to help me choose patterns for the wings of a butterfly that one of my young cousins asked me to draw for her. I chose the patterns a few weeks ago but I also wanted to add colour to the page.

My inability to sleep and the need for distraction from my pain, proved the perfect combination to keep me focused on finishing the page. As has happened at similar times before, the creative practice I’ve developed in recent years got me through more tough nights; and it will probably help get me to the other side of countless more.

 

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Breaking My Unplanned Break

I took a break from writing for what should have been a few weeks. The weeks have ballooned into months. Not because I planned it but because it was becoming difficult to parse through what I need to focus on to keep myself healthy(ish) and sane while living with chronic pain; and what I want to do, to stay engaged with the world while keeping myself above any potential downward spiral into depression.

For the past few weeks, I’ve been trying to restart what had become my daily mindful, creative practice that included writing, but I’m still struggling. I had hoped that eliminating the pressure of scheduled time in front of my laptop keyboard and mound of art supplies would somehow recharge me and reignite my enthusiasm to share what happens in my life involving my illness, treatments, and coping methods. However, it’s possible that the opposite happened. Stepping away for so long might have further rusted my ability to concentrate and coherently string words together; or it could simply be – as it was when I started my break – that it continues to grow more difficult to find a comfortable position to sit in for long enough to engage my creativity and to record my thoughts.

Thankfully, my break did not extend to creating in my art journals/sketchbooks. In the time I’ve been away, while drawing and doodling, I’ve been inspired to handwrite poetry that doesn’t feel forced for the sake of having content for my blog. I’ve also scribbled thoughts about all that has happened in the margins of my art journal/sketchbook pages. My hope is that some of these scribbled thoughts might make their way into or become full posts in the near future.

In the time I’ve been away from writing, I crossed what to me is a significant milestone: the fifth year of living with my illness, its growing list of side effects and continual pain. Since all of this started five years ago, I’ve grown intimately familiar with the struggle of maintaining focus and concentration – on pretty much everything – as I push myself through each day physically and emotionally with some days being monumentally worse than others are. Strangely, most days, I feel numb at the same time that my body is overwhelmed by intense and sometimes unbearable pain. I don’t know if that will make sense to anyone else: Feeling nothing, while feeling everything all at once.

I may not have recharged during this break, but I’ve come to realize that whether I’m engaged with my creative practice or not, I’ve managed to make it this far with my illness; and, I suppose, I’ll continue to move forward whether I write about it daily or not.

Breaking My Unplanned Break Outline – November 2018
Breaking My Unplanned Break Filled – November 2018